Misshape in the Go Slo

I wonder why I’m just writing this even though I’ve mentally done this review and published it.

For today, I’ll be telling y’all about my ice cream experience with Go Slo – a relatively new ice cream brand. They have four ice cream flavours out – peanut butter, salted caramel, cookies & cream and chocolate & almonds.

I unfortunately couldn’t attend their launch. I found out too late, I was hurt. I’m still hurt.

I got my first share from my friend’s salary and guess what my broke ass did. Yup, went to the mall to get ice cream. I was low on dopamine, I needed a boost. Then I decided to do something unusual, get a cup of Go Slo ice cream instead of my usual Coldstone strawberry rendezvous. I regretted this decision heavily. I lamented till I got home. Majorly because I couldn’t afford to be taking subpar comfort food in my broke state. I wanted to fight.

I asked my people (WhatsApp folks) for the best flavour to avoid disappointment. If I didn’t ask, everything would have been on me but I asked. Omo, months after it happened, I can still feel the pain. First taste and I was swirling it in my mouth looking for the heavy cream. Without the heavy cream, it had this sharp taste of cheap ice cream. I literally saw red because I avoid ice creams like that. I took more spoonfuls in case I was wrong in my first assessment. E be like feem trick for my body. This brand was crazily hyped. I felt really let down.

At some point, I remembered that I saw some chunks in the pictures on their social media pages. I started looking for it. I was laughing already, there was really nothing I could do.

Towards the end, I actually started tasting the salted caramel. Yes, all I had been tasting was basic cheap ice cream without flavour. You can imagine how poor I had to be for me not to throw it in the nearest dustbin. The salted caramel was so concentrated with too much sugar for something marketed as a premium product. Words cannot encompass all the emotions I felt that night.

All these many words just to tell you my readers that I will not be using my own money to buy Go Slo. Shalom.

If you’ve had Go Slo before and you had a better experience, please share. If you’ve had a disappointing experience with food in general, you can also share. Thank you!

I know I’ve been gone for a while. Life has been dealing with me. Send love and good vibes❤️